Introverts Unite Separately In Their Own Homes

Last year, I started an article with the statement, "I don't particularly consider myself social". With each passing day, I get an increasing number of opportunities to self dissect and try to reconcile my thoughts and feelings with what is actually happening around me in the real world. In the last few months, I've discovered that I'm not anti-social - I'm an introvert.

You know what introverts like me don't like? Small Talk!

Photo Credit @introvertspring.com

Would you sign up to have a four hour conversation full of small talk?
Hi, How are you? - good start to any conversation!
Busy day? - slow decline
Good weather today... - dead in the water
<Insert Awkward silence....>
Kill me now!!

Small talk to me is chatting about everything I'd rather not with a complete stranger.
Here are some common misconceptions about introverts.

Photo Credit @in5d.com

1. Introverts want to be left alone - they don't like to talk.
   This can sometimes be true. I like my space and I am not the kind of person that can party every week and feel great about it. I'm happy to go out for a coffee or a drink - a couple of hours a week. For me, catching up with friends is an avenue to talk, to vent, to debate and yes - to get some support as well as provide support. If the conversation moves to the weather - or repeatedly asking, "what else is happening?", its time to wrap up!
   Introverts don't talk unless they have something to say. Once you find a topic we are passionate about, its hard to shut us up!
2. Introverts are angry or unemotional.
   I had never really given this much thought. But after often hearing my husband ask, "Are you OK?" or being told to "Cheer up" one too many times, I started to wonder... is it me?

   

   Photo Credit @introvertspring.com

   
   Then, it clicked. Its my face! Introverts prefer to control their emotions and internalize them.
   I get it - regardless of my emotional state, whether I am bored, angry, amused, perplexed or just indifferent, my expression is the same. It is often referred to as Bitchy Resting Face!
   I'm not mad - I'm just an introvert and this is just my BRF!
3. Introverts need help getting out in public
   Thank you - but no. I'm not someone that struggles to converse. I don't need rescuing. I'm not shy or scared or 'needing a push'. Perhaps I'm tired, or maybe I don't know much about the topic of discussion. Perhaps I just haven't heard a topic of conversation I'm passionate about enough to jump in and contribute to.
   Or maybe, I'm just not into small talk!

Photo Credit @eliassculton.com

Don't get me wrong. I understand that small talk is a necessary evil. It allows us to strike up a conversation with complete strangers and faithfully stands by us until we get to know that person just a little better. It helps us move into the 'how was your holiday in (insert cool destination here)' territory. 

However, if after weeks, months or years of knowing someone, your conversation still doesn't make it past the "hi, how are you? how was you weekend?" statements, its time to call it quits. Its a waste of my time, and yours. Clearly neither of us in invested enough or interested in a more meaningful 'relationship'.

Still don't believe me? Here are 10 famous successful people you wouldn't expect to be introverted!

Photo Credit@inlouiswake.wordpress.com

1. Bill Gates
2. Warren Buffet
3. Barack Obama
4. Audrey Hepburn 
5. Hillary Clinton
6. Marissa Mayer
7. Mark Zuckerberg
8. JK Rowling
9. Eleanor Roosevelt
10. Mahatma Gandhi 

Personally, I'm rarely bored alone. I'm often bored in groups.
What about you? Are you an introvert or an extrovert?